Fat Woman With A Band

Friends can make you crazy. Friends can make you sad.

And friends can make you proud. And they can make you happy. And that make you laugh. And laugh. And laugh.

This week my friends have been amazingly supportive. They’ve fussed over me. Told me how good I look. Even suggested I could stop losing weight.

This is me smiling. Thanks friends.

I read about this woman today, and thought it was time to provide an update on my real gastric band.

Now that I’ve lost 70 pounds, I can feel the port a bit more when I put my hands just below my rib cage. It feels a bit more at the surface of my skin. I don’t think it’s moved, but rather the layer of blubber covering it has diminished slightly.

I also experience a feeling like a cramp or a side stitch from time to time. Sometimes I feel this when I’m sitting in the car, or less often after eating. The feeling passes after a while, and it’s not painful.

I think the band is living up to its good press. It helps me regulate how much I eat, plain and simple. I can feel when I’ve had enough food, and it always less than I would have chosen to eat in the past. In conjunction with this I think I’m making wiser choices when eating. I do more planning on what I’m going to eat throughout the day, and try to make sure I get enough protein at each meal.

I don’t beat myself up when I do have something that’s not a “diet” food, e.g., beer or dessert (though for some people beer=dessert), but I do limit the amount and I feel I’m taking part in the festivities.

After slightly more than five months with the band, I’m pleased with the results and my progress.

For the last three weigh-ins I’ve been gaining and losing the same pound. This means I’ve officially plateaued – or perhaps stuck in a rut is more apt. I am miffed, and suprisingly for me, not overly miffed.

I went to NYC last week and though I didn’t go overboard, I did have foods I haven’t in a while, and I did enjoy some beers. I balanced that with a lot of walking. Now at home, I’m back to the usual routines and foods, and I hope I can lose some by the next weigh-in. If I don’t I’ll have to  … actually, I don’t have a plan … yet.

At Slimband the nutrionist said that when we go into a plateau she’ll help us out. This help begins by documenting our meals. I so dislike doing that. There are some websites that help you do the documentation, which may make it easier. I find meal documentation a burden. I’ll pick that burden up if at the next weigh-in I haven’t lost at least two pounds. (Here’s one website that could help with record keeping: www.fitday.com.)

In NYC one of my travelling companions met a young woman who had laprascopic surgery about two years ago. She lost 130 pounds in about 18 months. She is in her early 20′s. I hope that could be true for me – but weight loss in your early 50′s is not the same as in your early 20′s. Good for her though. Really good.

Going to do some rowing now, and then a walk to try and get out of this rut.

Today is a day to think about what you eat. Stop dieting and start eating.

Not over-eating, eating. Eating food that makes sense, in quantities and qualities that are good for you. Here’s a good article from www.divine.ca, an online women’s magazine.

And here’s an article describing why a day was set aside to think about not dieting – it’s from about.com.

So, I’m not dieting today – I’m eating the right amount and the right stuff for me.

I lost weight again, thank goodness.

I know I shouldn’t obsess, and I know that I shouldn’t expect to lose weight each week. But that is my expectation. No amount of self-talk helps me … I just have to live with it. Live with the idea that I’ll continue to lose weight each week, and then live with it when I don’t.

On the happy side, I’ve had a couple of days of uber walking. Of course my little muscles are screaming, but never mind. I also know that at some point in the not too distant future I’ll have to kick up my exercise a notch or two. I’m just not quite ready to do that. And by “that” I mean going to the gym and using the torture equipment. Sounds lovely, doesn’t?

I had my teeth whitened this week. One’s teeth are graded on a scale of A1 – D4, with D4 being the dingiest. My teeth were D3-D4. Now they’re D2-ish – you can’t jump from the “D” line to the “A” line apparently.The procedure itself wasn’t onerous – it only took about two hours start to finish. I’m happy with the result.

Hey I just realized! I haven’t said how much I’ve lost. I’m down 65 pounds. And people have noticed. Two people whom I haven’t seen in a little while saw me this past week. Neither realized it was me to begin with, and both were very complimentary. Thanks S & B, it means a lot to me.

A happy week! Yeah me!

It’s disconcerting that having a life, that is a social life, is incompatible with making wise food choices. At least for me it seems to be true.

A social life means meeting friends at food and drink venues. I do try and combine a walk with meeting, but it’s not always possible because of time constraints or because there’s more than one person involved.

I try to make sure that I get a walk in somehow. I walk to the meeting spot, or I go early, park my car and then go for a walk and end up back at the restaurant or bar at the meeting time. It weighs less on my mind during lunch or dinner if I know that I’ve got my exercise quota convered and I can enjoy sitting and schmoozing.

The food choices are harder for me to regulate. Even though I know I physically can’t consume the same quantity as I could have before my banding, the habit to overindulge is hard to break. I know all the tips ‘n tricks: order an appetizer instead of an entree, order the light or lunch portion instead of the dinner portion, order steamed or grilled, order salads with dressing on the side, etc.

But last week I lost less than a pound. It’s the least amount I’ve lost since banding, and what changed for me was the number of times I ate out. This week I’ve eaten out a lot again, and I think I’ll show the same small amount. In the coming month I’ve got a trip planned, and lots more social engagements. I’m concerned about not meeting my goal of losing 100 pounds by December 11.

On the other hand, I can’t be a hermit because then I’ll be a crab.

When one loses weight there’s more than just the joy of seeing the numbers on the scale get ever smaller, there’s also the “non-scale victories.” These victories are a direct result of weight loss. Things like fitting into smaller clothes, or sleeping better, or having less joint pain. Each of these is true for me.

But there are other things, too. Here are three examples.

1. I attend aquafit at the Y at least three times a week. I use the ladder in the deep end of the pool to get out at the end of the class. I used to climb the ladder one rung a time, that is go up a rung with one foot, pause, bring my other leg up to that rung, and then continue to the next. I can now go up the ladder one rung after another without pausing. The pause was about joint pain, and not having the strength to heave myself up and out of the water. Less joint pain, more strength, and less of a body to heave. Yeah!
2. My basement stairs are covered by a trap door. To get in and out requires some agility as it’s an awkward to climb in, and equally awkard to climb out. Last week I had to go into the basement with a service person. It’s been at least a year since I tried to go down myself – the last few times my sister did the climbing for me when I needed a stored suitcase. I didn’t really think about the climb in, but I was concerned about the climb out. It also requires some agility and some strength. I didn’t want to embarrass myself in front of the service person. But in the end, I just did it. No problem. Yeah, again!
3. I have a big cushion I wear on my behind. You might even call it a fat-ass. Well my ass has been shrinking a bit, along with my other bits. One way I’ve noticed this is I now sit lower in my car seat, and I’ve had to adjust the rearview mirror. I also fit better in my seat. Yeah!

I’ll share more as I experience them. I wonder if my shoe size will get smaller?

I have returned from my first vacation with a laparoscopic band. I’m very pleased with how it all went, and not just the eating part.

I went to New York City where I was surrounded by food. There are street vendor carts everywhere selling food I’d happily quaff. You’ve got your pretzels, your nuts, your middle eastern food, and your hot dogs. Then there’s the coffee, the bagels, and the pastries. All that before you get inside.

What I was really happy to see is that many places had calorie listings for their food, especially the fast food or lunch places. All the chain burger joints listed calories on their signs, but even Pret a Manger, Au Bon Pain, Starbucks, Europa Cafe, and others had food listed with calories. Amazing! I know calories aren’t the be-all and end-all of eating smart, but it’s a good start. I found it really helpful.

Now having said that, I didn’t have any really great meals. I had two good meals, and all the others were not memorable. I started each day with oatmeal with fruit. Definitely a larger portion than at home – no excuses.

I had one vegetarian meal in Greenwich Village that was tasty, similar to the quality of food at Fresh or Big Carrot. The other meal was chicken, brown rice, and a salad combination at Au Bon Pain. Very good.

In previous trips I would have eaten deli – I stayed just down the street from Carnegie, Stage, and Ben Ash delis – pasta, asian, and more fried foods. I didn’t do any of that this time. Did I miss it? Yes, a bit. But not enough that I actually went and had any of it.

So, I think I could have done a little better making my food choices, but I’m still happy with what I did. What I’m most proud of though are the non-scale victories. And there are a few.

Beginning with the airplane ride. Simply put, I could do up my seat belt. And I could put the tray table down all the way. You have no idea how big a deal that is. No idea. These two simple things made me very happy. Very.

In NYC you can do a lot of walking; I did as much as I could. For the most part I felt fine. I had enough energy, and my joints didn’t ache too much. The only time I felt physically challenged was at MOMA; strolling and standing as you do in a museum is uncomfortable to the point of painful for me. At least this showed I still have lots of work to do, and I have to work more on loosening up my IT band and bum muscles. If it isn’t one band, it’s the other.

The trip was a good test for me, and I’m proud of how I navigated my way with the band.

Do it when you’re ready and not a moment before.

What’s “it”? Pretty much anything, really. My “it” is all about weight loss. Here’s how the timing worked for me, and the process I took to lapband surgery.

1. I was feeling very unhealthy, again, and I knew I had to do something about it, again. But, I was having a very hard time getting motivated. I had been looking at weight loss surgery alternatives, but just couldn’t convince myself to do more than read about it.
2. A friend has a friend who had lapband surgery, and was very successful losing weight. My interest goes up a notch.
3. I do some research on the procedure and can find lots of positive information about it, and not much negative. Interest is definitely climbing.
4. I make an appointment at Slimband (then called TLBC), and even though it’s a marketing blurb, my interest continues at a high level. I give myself a deadline to make a decision in the vein of “shit or get off the pot.”
5. It’s the end of the year – a time to think about how the year went, and how next year could be better. What could be better than getting healthy?
6. I sign-up for surgery.

So, the tipping point (aren’t I fashionable?) was researching weight loss surgeries and then finding a person who has undergone the procedure with good results.

So I’ve changed my eating habits substantially since surgery 13 weeks ago. More fibre, more fruit, more veggies, and less bread, pasta, and fried foods. I roast or steam my vegetables, have roasted chicken or turkey, and much more vegetarian or soy products. Lots of water, and no soft drinks. Tea more often than coffee, but usually only one cup of either each day. I think I’m doing pretty darn good. But …

I’m bored of my own cooking. If a make a batch of stuff, I eat it almost everyday until it’s all gone. I never think to freeze the portions – I’m going to have to work on that. So, it’s very good timing for me than I’m off to NYC next week. Not only is it one of my favourite cities, but it has lots of food choices.

I’m not going to “fall off the wagon”, just make the best choices I can without making myself crazy or worry about whether I’m eating too much, or not the right things.

The change will do me good. Then when I get back I’ll be able to get back into my kitchen and start cooking again.

I get so much out of being with friends and loved ones. Yet when I’m in trouble, usually emotionally and sometimes even physically I tend to withdraw. There’s probably some psychological reason for that – maybe one of you can enlighten me – and though I know I can almost always feel better after talking, I still withdraw.

I attended a support group at the clinic this week and I was reminded yet again how the happiness hormones kick in after just talking and interacting with others. I wasn’t in a particular bad headspace before the meeting, just having an average day. At the meeting I met eight women who were in different stages after lapband surgery. I knew one woman as we are attending the same nutrition class, but I had never met any of the others, or the facilitator.

Obviously we had a few similarities:

• female
• overweight
• had laparoscopic band surgery
• had lost weight
• had been overweight a long time.

All the other women had children, and by coincidence three of the women were nurses.

The facilitator led the discussion, and most of the women shared their experiences – how they felt, what worked for them, etc.  And even though we ranged in age from early thirties to late sixties (a guess as no one asked about ages and I’m really bad at guessing age), we each had similar experiences and feelings around being overweight and living with the band.

The topic which had the most diverse opinions and experiences was “who had we told we were banded.” Many of the participants had told only the closest family. I, of course, have told just about everyone. Though I’m being a bit disingenuous as I’ve told only those people who, as the nutritionist says, “are interest-ready.” I think as I lose more weight more people will ask what’s going on, and I may share even more then.

I’m going to come looking for you the next time I feel stranded.